I realised that I am very stingy when it comes to shedding tears. I have learnt and tolerated too many things to cry about them. The recent one was my breakup. Tears of regret? I don't know. Might be. But well, I think that what matters is, the tears which are from the heart.. why do i say so? I learnt alot in my years. My eyes get red but no tears get shed. usually i would go to the toilet to calm myself down, wash up and all, but yeah, nothing comes out from my the tear ducts…
Same as when i see people get hurt… What do I do? I listen to people.. but who listens to me when i need to pour my feelings? I am at a loss. Damn. Things that are so near, yet so far. I could grasp it within reach, but would it allow me to grasp onto it? or would it just, fly by and it gets forgotten through the years…?
I wonder. Missing someone is miserable. I don't want to have these kind of feeling… My true self? I don't know. Facades I have worn has counted too many to describe. Online, I don't even know what is myself. I miss her…? Guess so. Argh…